5th grade struggles are tougher as a parent than they were as a kid. I’m under a lot of pressure. It wasn’t easy, for me, to fight off the H.B.O (Haitian Body Odor) taunts and spend my entire 5th grade year making everyone think I was from Martinique. It was rough but navigating this terrain as a parent, who’s child sometimes feels lost, is on a whole other level. I can’t screw up. I say the wrong thing and it could scar her for life.
She’s trying to find her people. I so badly want her to find her people. As much as my Haitian parents would say ‘don’t live for friends,’ I know how important it is to have your people or your person. I started to find mine in the 6th and 7th grade. So I know her people will come. I reinforce that she needs to choose wisely because once she finds her people/person, they could very well be around for years. Mine still are. 30+ years and counting.
She’s looking for that person to have long, meaningless conversations with. That person to pass notes to. That person to share knowing looks with that hold secrets that only you two know. I get it. I just hope that when she finds her person, I like the mom. Ok...not about me. Seriously though, her people/person will come. She just needs to be patient. Until then, I’ll keep reminding her that:
You are beautiful and you are loved
You have people by default. Your sisters will always be your people
You will find your people along your life’s journey, so you don’t NEED to find them today
Although it’s nice to have people, it isn’t the end of the world