No I'm not currently pregnant but I really want to have another baby. Most people think I'm crazy and my husband ignores me when I bring it up but I've always pictured myself with 4 children. I already have 3 beautiful girls. I love them very much and I know they love me, but I really want a mama's boy. Right now, those little ladies are all about daddy. They come to me when they're hurt, have cuts or mosquito bites. I know that over the years our relationships will change. Right now, I'm the protector. They'll hate me throughout their teenage years, then we'll all be besties as they move into their 20's. I'm glad I have them, but a beautiful baby boy would bring it all together. Yes, it's crazy to think that I have control over the gender. If I'm going to be honest, a healthy baby is what's important. I swear, I'll stop at 4 no matter what.
Women of a certain age are still having babies, so I'm not worried that it'll be difficult to handle it. The thing is, these kids are expensive. I'm hoping that the windfall that I've been expecting comes before I turn 40. I'm putting it out into the universe.
I've had pretty good pregnancies as well as fairly quick and easy labor and deliveries. When the time comes, I'm confident that I can do it again without any issue. Trying to get pregnant, however, had it's up and downs.
My relationship with TTC (trying to conceive) was definitely love/hate. Don't get me wrong we had a lot of fun, but really, I loved one thing and one thing only. I'm not going to state the obvious. You all can figure it out.
With that said, I could go on and on about what I hated, but I'll only leave you with these 5 things.
5 THINGS I HATED ABOUT TRYING TO GET PREGNANT
1)THE PREGNANCY TESTS- First response and Clear Blue Easy were my BFFs. Over the course of a few months, I spent a lot of money on pregnancy tests. Those things are about $16 a pop. I must have had 4 or 5 packs on standby - always. Every time I was a day late I'd take a test. I'd check to see if I got a + or -. If I got a minus, I'd re-check because it had to be wrong...right. I'm going to estimate that I went through over 30 pregnancy test before I finally got pregnant. It seems that the kids were expensive before they even existed.
2)THE OVULATION KIT- Now these bad boys are not $16 a pop. After a few months of trying on our own to no avail, I decided to get an ovulation kit. Rite Aid is one of my favorite places. My friends know that if you can't find me, I'll be at Rite Aid. When the one around the corner from me transitioned to a 24-hr store, I was in heaven. One night, while at Rite Aid, Frank and I walked passed the ovulation kits, I grabbed one before heading to the counter. It was a busy night with very long lines, so we waited a few minutes. Finally our turn and I place my items on the counter. The cashier starts scanning and gives me the total: $65
Me: Come again! Did you say $65?!!
Cashier: Yes ma'am. That'll be $65.
Me: How could that be? I bought gum, deodorant, ice cream and this ovulation kit.
Cashier: Well...the ovulation kit is $45.
Me: It's what?!!
Frank: (in a whisper) Hon, there's a line of people behind us. Just pay the bill.
Me: (in a harsh whisper) No. Pregnancy tests are $16, why the hell is this thing so much?
Frank: (through clenched teeth) I don't know. Please don't embarrass us. Just pay and let's go.
Me: Damnit. You owe me big time. Ughhhhh.
Frank: Consider my debt paid when you get knocked up.
45 damn dollars for a stick that you pee on!!! I couldn't believe. Two came in a pack. I used one and 10 years later I still have the other. I need to check the expiration date, because I'll be damned if I spend another $45 on a 2nd ovulation kit.
3)THE STRESS- When we decided that we were ready to have children, I was convinced that it would happen right away. Wrong. It took longer than expected and what I loved so much about it wasn't fun anymore. I remember one morning, I was getting ready for work and knew that I was ovulating. I ran into the bedroom to wake Frank up because now was the time. He was sick as a dog. He looked up at me, with a red nose and glassy eyes and in a stuffy voice said "Honey ((cough)) ((cough)), I'm not feeling well. I can't do this right now."
Me: I get it. I completely understand but you see, I'm ovulating right now.
Frank: Are you serious? I'm sick. I've got snot coming out of my nose, I'm coughing, my chest hurts. I'm not doing this right now.
Me: That's the thing. You don't have to do anything. Just lay there and I'll do all the work.
Frank: This is crazy!
Me: Look, I have to get to work anyway so I promise to be quick.
Frank: Fine!!!! Come on. Let's go!!!...I can't believe this.
He was not happy and I felt extremely guilty. That was the day I decided that there'd be no more ovulation kits and no more stress. I was going to put it in God's hands and let it happen when the time was right.
4)THE ANTICIPATION - It was killing me. I always thought I was pregnant until I checked and test said that I wasn't.
5)GIVING UP THE GOOD STUFF - In anticipation of getting pregnant, I was taking all of the necessary precautions.
-I'm not a huge drinker, however I do enjoy a nice glass of Arbor Mist every now and then. Yes, I said Arbor Mist. There's nothing wrong with wine that comes in a bottle with a twist off cap or in a box. Although Arbor Mist is as strong as fruit punch, I wasn't taking any chances.
-I stopped taking Aleve. The only thing that works for me when I have a headache or any ache is Aleve. But when you're pregnant, your only allowed Tylenol. All of the other "hard drugs" are a no-no.
-I gave up cold cuts. Thank you very much listeria. I didn't have my favored prosciutto and mozzarella hero until after the babies were born. I wasn't interested in diamonds or pearls. All I wanted, as a push present, was a sandwich.
It took a few months before we found out that we were having a baby. The day I saw a + sign, was one of the happiest of my life. That moment of elation erased every negative thought or feeling I had about trying to get pregnant.
Check out Thersdays next week for the 5 things I loved/hated about being pregnant.